Still on my mind


It’s been awhile since I blogged about my Dad.  It doesn’t mean I haven’t thought of him.  I suppose it means I’m adjusting to the fact that he is gone.  Perhaps it helped that I didn’t live near him and that I only saw him a handful of times during any given year.  I still miss him though.

Especially when I turn on my tablet to read a book or check something online.  The last picture I have of him smiling and laughing is on the backdrop.  I can’t bear to take it down and I can’t bear to look at it at times.  Tonight while my daughter curled up on my lap before bed, it was on sitting in front of us.  She didn’t say a thing, she just swished the page across, so to get a clear screen to see the photo.  As I held my little girl all snuggled up on my lap, looking at my Dad, tears began to fall upon my cheeks.

DAD 2

The thing that made me so sad was the fact that I won’t see that smile again.  I won’t feel the hugs he gave again.  That’s what brought the tears.  That is what I miss.

Only ten minutes before I read an email from a friend that gave me so much joy, so much purpose, so much opportunity.  I still find joy in that email, and the tears have stopped.  They didn’t last too long, but I still miss my Dad. Taking the joy with the heartache is part  of life I know.

I won’t quit missing my Dad, but I think I will go back to that email.  He’d rather I feel joy than sadness I do believe.

 

Grace is a gift,

Julie

Advertisements

Share your Grace by commenting! I'd love to learn, grow, and get to know you all!

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s