Adoption – What I want to say


Every time I see a post from the Circle of Love Maternity home on my Facebook news feed I literally smile.  It’s not only the beautiful photos of little babies that get me but the feeling of knowing that someone chose to give their child a family when they were unable to parent.  Circle of Love Maternity Home is unique so be sure to check out their What We Do page.  They did not ask me to share about them, the following is my own opinions.

I have become a Mother myself three times and through a couple different means. One of them being at the young age of 17 and this last time was through adoption at age 37. I have felt many different things through my life in motherhood. I have much respect for the birth parents that choose adoption and I feel they are still parents.   Perhaps this comes from my own experiences, I don’t know.

Mom & P

They ultimately choose to grow another family when they felt they were unable to parent.  They loved their child so much they made a sacrifice to fill the child’s needs before their own and also deal with a large loss for themselves.

I have never met or even spoke to anyone at the Circle of Love Maternity Home, but it has peaked my interest to see where God is leading me.  I have thoughts of different types of volunteering in this big world, perhaps eventually it will be in some manner through children and adoption.  One never knows and I’m not shutting the door on much these days!  I felt moved to share their site although there are many different types of agencies available.  We didn’t use them in our adoption in 2008.

I never met our daughter’s birth mother or father, it was a closed adoption.  There wasn’t a great deal of information either.  We placed our faith in God and made a choice so many years ago to accept what God had given us.  That opportunity so far, 7 years later, has been one of the most rewarding and best things to enter my life. Let me tell you, I said it many times that I was done “having kids” mostly because I did start so young.  God had another plan, I like His better!

If you are struggling with growing your family on your own terms or if you are an unmarried girl/woman unsure what you want to do with the future, don’t hesitate to seek help.

This is what I want to say to each of you.

To the family that is concerned they won’t be able to bond or love a child that isn’t of their blood I want to tell you something.  IF you never take the chance you will wonder forever.  IF you take the chance it could turn out to be one of the most amazing adventures given to you.  I’m rooting for the later and it’s ok that you feel this way. My own spouse felt the same thing when we were adopting, if only you could see him now!

To the pregnant woman (and father) that is carry a gift from God.  Do not look down upon yourself if you feel you are not quite ready or whatever the reason is that adoption had entered your mind.  Seek an agency, Pastor, counselor, mentor, or someone who you feel comfortable talking to about it.  Choose someone who will be objective and not emotionally attached, that can help you look at this from a perspective that will aid you.  Whether it be to parent or not, you need someone to help you.  If you are a teenager or forty something year old, you still need someone.  No matter the choice you pick,  go into it knowing you won’t be alone and that you can do it.  It won’t be easy either way but don’t do anything you are not comfortable with.  As an adoptive mother I want to tell you that although becoming a mother through adoption was really important to me I wouldn’t want you uncomfortable.  I am hoping most adoptive parents feel this way.

Better than what I have to say, watch this video.  It really does let you see things from both perspectives.  It’s a lovely video.

Circle of Love Success

This coming November over at In Between the Sunsets of Life we will host our Adoption Series 2015.  In 2014, we shared stories from various adoptive parents, birth mothers, adopted child, and our own. (You can see them all by clicking here.)  We did this to bring awareness to adoption and reflect the joy there is in the world of adoption.  If you are interested in sharing your story or need someone to talk to about adoption, please contact me at betweenthesunsets@gmail.com.

Adoption Series 2015

Please feel free to share this post so we can find others that want to share their story with the world.  Thank you and remember….

Grace is a gift,

Julie

 

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